The little, green troll dressed in his burlap sack sat on the back of my couch. Stick in one hand and a cigar in the other.
"You got a light my man?"
"Don't smoke in my house, and what are you doing in my house anyways?"
The cigar disappeared, replaced with a pouty look, which was really disturbing on a tiny, green face with too large eyes.
"You haven't really been looking for the others have you?"
"I like to think that night never happened."
"Unfortunately it did my man, and you've attracted some unwanted attention."
"The fuck does that mean?" my whole body tensed of its own accord, the dagger bringing itself up.
"The previous owner of that claw had some friends, and they are pissed that she's dead."
"That thing was a she?"
"That the only thing you heard white boy? The forces of darkness are pissed at you and you're surprised that you killed a girl?"
"Sorry, easily distracted, so what does that mean?"
"They know where you are and they are coming for you, more specifically the Rake's brother is on his way."
"I hate the pronoun game, who is the Rake's brother?"
"Testy much? His name is Jeff the Killer."
"Jeff? That's not exactly terrifying."
"He is the embodiment of every serial killer ever mixed with clowns, and he's headeh your way."
"Clowns, wasn't that already done?"
"You always been an asshole or what?"
"Sorry, I get sarcastic when things get out of my control."
It was this point I got up and checked the front door lock, peering around outside through the glass. My wife and the kids were in bed already, and I probably wasn't going to get any sleep now.
Billy Dee Yoda turned to watch me, his big eyes staring intently, it suddenly occurred to me I had never seen him blink. Almost as if on cue he blinked long and slow, like an old muppet.
"You think that's gonna help my man?"
I grabbed the Freyr off my desk and slid it into my belt, it occurred to me that, I probably needed to clean up since I was, pretty sure there was a keyboard on that desk somewhere.
"I have no idea what's going to help, I got lured into the woods by a Yoda wannabe who sequestered me into an ultimate battle between good and evil."
"Sequestered? That's a big word, well I honestly can't tell you what's going to help anymore than I have."
"Then why are you here?"
"Give you a warning, and remind you of your call to action."
"You're a dick."
He was gone, I checked my phone, it was quarter to midnight. I went through the house one room at a time, checking on my daughter, my son, and my wife in that order.
I grabbed the Mare's Leg out of the safe and settled in on the couch for a long night.
Turns out it wasn't that long.
Friday, 25 May 2018
Karl Dies in this Book: Chapter 6
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